Um, so, I learned a lingerie chest is a very specific type of furniture that places don't keep a lot of versions of AND they usually run around $300 on the lower end. So, off to ikea we went to purchase the $150 version, which we put together in 3 hours the next day. It's simple but beautiful and I seriously felt a sense of accomplishment after making it through all 27 steps without resorting to drinking or throwing things.
Um, so, I learned a lingerie chest is a very specific type of furniture that places don't keep a lot of versions of AND they usually run around $300 on the lower end. So, off to ikea we went to purchase the $150 version, which we put together in 3 hours the next day. It's simple but beautiful and I seriously felt a sense of accomplishment after making it through all 27 steps without resorting to drinking or throwing things.
Also, tonight is my last Beginning Turkish class. Can I get an "Amen?" I've enjoyed the class, but working on noun cases for the past 3 weeks with no forward movement has been incredibly frustrating. I had a pretty good grasp after the first class we worked on them, but I guess she felt the rest of the students were confused enough to warrant an additional 2 sessions (out of 6) on the same stinkin' subject. I think I might go back to Rosetta Stone until I can find an Intermediate class with a little more momentum - I'm not a fan of being forced to pace people who are having trouble grasping pretty simple concepts. Even after discussing my concerns with the teacher, it was clear she did not want to move on to another subject and obviously was not attentive enough to understand how far ahead of the other students a few of us are already moving.
I have a butt-load to take care of around the apartment in the next 7 days, which I am slowly trying to teach myself to refer to as "our" apartment. After 30 years of being an only child and a number of years living on my own (with a few brief failed attempts at cohabitation in my late teens and early 20s,) sometimes I find myself having to consciously focus on the fact that it is now technically "our" apartment and the things in it are essentially "ours" (hands off my Dermalogica, boyfriend.) Once he's actually physically there and helping me with the nitty gritty (like cleaning and finances,) I'm sure it will come much more naturally.
I'm surprisingly not super freaked out about the fact that in a month or so I will no longer be living alone, like, ever again. I know the initial time period where we're crammed into a little one bedroom is going to take adjusting to, but we have our eyes on the prize - a 2 bedroom pet-friendly home with a washer and dryer located somewhere north of the current place. Together. That's the best/most important/coolest part.
In honor of that happy event, I give you some Al Green:
Last time Bear left, we agreed that if he were to be gone any longer than 2 months on this recent trip we would figure out a way for one of us to visit. I am now positive this is a pretty good rule to follow from this point forward, for the sake of our sanity if nothing else.
The first month, I'm "OK." I can usually keep myself busy and there aren't too many effects on my daily life, though I am bummed about the non-cuddling and may get a little lazy with my cleaning efforts. Once it passes that one month mark, I start to get sad. Now, if the absence is only one month beyond that I can usually keep it together for another week or so until I have to start readying myself for his return. Pass that one month month with no return date to look forward to and I start to get really sad. Like, "put me on medication sad." I wish I were joking.
Maybe it's just the multiple disappointments we've both had to face this year schedule-wise while still trying to move our relationship forward and the stress of being apart so much AND maybe it will be more bearable as the months go by and we can actually spend more time together than apart, but when it was becoming clear he was going to be gone for 12+ weeks instead of the projected 6-8 it was simply too much for me to handle.
He's my best friend, he's the love of my life, he is my rock; being apart is overwhelmingly hard on both of us. I was already incredibly bummed he'd be gone for Christmas, to add another month beyond that was unimaginable for me. I was crushed. Sadly, it doesn't just strain our relationship, it's also really hard on the friendships I've developed with the rest of his band/management, too.
Thankfully, my Bear is keeping his word. I'm not sure exactly how it came about, but as the offer for the January tour dates became more concrete he apparently became more convinced that he need to come home for a visit. Just like that, "how the hell am I going to make it another 2 months??" transitioned to "oh crap, I have less than 3 weeks to get my sh*t together."
So, he'll come back for a visit and brighten my spirits for the holidays then should only be gone another month beyond that for the tour...Afterward he can come home to me and we can find a bigger place of our own. Finally, our hard work this year will start to pay off the way it should. THAT I can handle.
Beyond the fact that I am personally afflicted and hope for better treatment options for myself, I am also fully aware that it affects more than 46 million Americans, including 300,000 children, costing the U.S economy over $128 billion annually. Yes, indeed - billions of dollars as one of the nation's most common causes of disability.
I've raised a respectable amount of money in the past, but I truly get the most joy out of the ritual it has become. The Madre will come pick my inevitably grumpy ass up and drop me off in downtown Seattle, where I lace on my bells (alone or with friends) and get my cold butt as quickly to the finish line as I can manage so I can go inside somewhere for breakfast and mimosas. I always smile when the carols start, sometimes I get a little teary, but I always have fun.
If you like to run, please consider joining me this year as one of those crazy people who gets up too early in the cold on a Sunday morning (we can celebrate with mimosas!) You can register here: http://www.seattlejinglebellrun.org/
If you don't like to run and aren't slightly insane and maybe have a few bucks to spare for a really great cause, please consider helping me with my fundraising here: http://seattlejinglebellrun.kintera.org/lovepigeon
If neither are possible for you this year, I'd still love to have your support in spirit! It's freakin' chilly out there.
Most evenings after I get home from work we'll talk for a for a while, sometimes on the weekends we'll just leave the camera for hours on as we work on projects separately, occasionally he'll get into bed and just leave his laptop open until the battery dies after he falls asleep.
It's no substitute for having my living, breathing dude snuggled up to me on the couch with our kitties, but it's a lot better than relying on phone calls, emails and letters to stay in touch, of course.
As bummed out as I was last week after finding out about Christmas, there's really nothing he could've done to be a better boyfriend.
On Monday, Seattle was hit with snow. My coworker who lives near me had ridden her bike to work, so I volunteered to give her a ride home. On my way from her apartment to my own (it took an hour to go from work to her place to my place - all in West Seattle,) I quickly realized my cute little Hyundai is not made for inclement weather. There was a near death experience and a major curb check that trashed one of my front rims; by the time I made it home I was sore, tired and a more than a little freaked out. I opened my mail only to find my one year anniversary gift waiting for me - a gift card for a manicure, pedicure and massage at the salon he goes to for his haircuts in Seattle.
Tuesday was a "Snow Day" and the day he told me he wasn't scheduled to come home before December 25th.
Wednesday, I cried a lot. He tried to reassure me a lot.
Thursday (Thanksgiving,) was our anniversary.
Historically, The Madre and I never found much use for the whole big turkey dinner. That didn't change after I got out on my own, but we wanted to spend time together (um, that's the real meaning of the holidays, riiiight?) so she took me to breakfast at one of our local go-to diners and we chatted for a while.
Once I got home I pulled the Christmas tree out of storage, since Bear and I had already decided to put it up "together" before he told me he wouldn't be here for the actual holiday. It's a pre-lit, 3 foot artificial cutie - perfectly sized for my apartment. Most of the ornaments were the ones with sentimental value that I convinced Ma to left me have when I moved out, but Bear did get me a few more at Turkfest and I had some traditional balls to fill up space.
We got on Skype and after the usual catch up for the day and "love yous" and "happy anniversaries," I popped on some holiday music and got down to setting it up. He worked on music and occasionally gave input, even suggesting maybe we just leave it up for the next year to make up for him not being here for Christmas. While I can't imagine that happening, especially since we'll be moving into a bigger place as soon as possible when he returns, the idea cheered me up.
***One of the many many many reasons I love him - even from across the planet he puts a huge smile on my face.***
When I finally finished up, he was definitely ready for bed (I always forget if Turkey is 9 or 10 hours ahead, but the bottom line is - boyfriend stays up really late to be able to see me,) so I left the laptop open and kept working around my place until I was sure he had drifted off to sleep.
Our relationship has been a little unconventional, but I will give him this - Bear is doing everything in his power to keep me happy despite the distance. As sad as I can get sometimes, I know that I am a very lucky girl to have such a devoted guy itching to come home to me.
Technically, that means this year he'll have been gone for all of my favorite holidays (Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.) Did I mention that Thanksgiving is our one year anniversary? Yeahhhh. And this is after my birthday in September basically got pre-empted for a show. I'm growing more than weary of this.
For The Madre and I, these days have always been mellow but shared with the ones we love that are closest and most important to us - usually each other and/or our oldest friends. I was really looking forward to sharing that with him this year, since last year at this time we had just started officially dating and kept the holidays quite "light." I knew it was possible he wouldn't be home, but now that he's said it out loud it is a lot more real.
Honestly, I'm crushed. Right now I feel like all my holiday spirit is gone.
P.S. Though I truly appreciate the fact that some of my friends might think that inviting me out will help, please don't - it's not going to.
Sunday I was too tired to even make the effort to play video games and resorted to watching as much Deadwood as possible and working on my Turkish homework.
I hate being sick.
One session strains my brain, the other works my body but both push the boundaries of my confidence.
After all the running around I did this week, I didn't get to talk to Bear much on Skype and by Friday I definitely needed a night in to treat myself to a nice bath, some shows, hot tea and take out pizza and ice cream from my local favorites Proletariat and Full Tilt. It's also possible there may be a pedicure in my very near future.
It's definitely going to be a more hectic pace than I am used to during the week, but it will clearly help keep me busy and distracted until my dude can come home. Also, it means I don't have a lot of time on the weekdays to clean, so "Helloooooo again" Domestic Goddess Sundays!
True, they were almost nothing compared to that once practically terrifying approach to the new elementary school(s), junior high(s) and high school(s), yet my nerves were buzzing all day.
Our Beginning Turkish teacher is doing her PhD at University of Washington, so we have the luxury of using one of the Smart Rooms on campus. Parking and the classroom were easy enough to find and there were only 2 other students in the room when I arrived: one woman probably about my age and another around The Madre's age (mid-50s.) Soon enough another college-age girl arrived, followed by a guy probably a few years older than myself. After we all introduced ourselves and shared our reasons for signing up for the class (the majority of us are in a relationship with a Turkish person,) we got to schoolin'.
The beginning of our session was a bit scattered and we experienced a few hiccups, but by the end of class I was confident that our teacher (albeit a bit kooky) was definitely going to be able help us understand the basics. Of course, one of the first steps is learning the alphabet. Pretty sure I'll be practicing that this upcoming week with anyone willing to listen and watching this video over and over again.:
Next week we should get our workbooks and be able to progress even further. I'm gonna learn to speak Turkish, y'all!
Now if only India's record company would actually let Youtube broadcast the official videos, the GBF and I would be a lot happier.
***Oops. that didn't last very long, did it? TURKEY: YouTube banned, again, over sex-scandal video
Okay, not things like art and throw pillows, we're talking actual art and throw pillows.
I gather up stuff and take it to Goodwill, I clean like the dickens, etc. I think of it as nesting, but it definitely doesn't seem like the typical/standard pre-baby "nesting..." Probably because it's not, I suppose - there's no babies happenin' up in my goods anytime soon (PTL.)
On Friday I finally bought one of my friend Valentina Vitols photograph prints - one that I had my eye on for ages.
Saturday I bought...Wait for it...A throw pillow.
This time I even threw in a new throw for good measure. (Unfortunately, due it it's "bunnysoft" awesomeness my cat Gizmo seems to have adopted it as her long lost mother which means not only will she not leave me alone when I'm cuddling in it she apparently also feels compelled to drool all over the darn thing.)
For instance, I had about 3 blog entries scheduled to post when I realized that some of you might actually be interested in the following:
I did in fact end up staying in on Halloween (sort of.) Bear left me with an updated entertainment set-up, so on Saturday morning the Madre came over to help me take my old 27" tube TV down the 3 flights of stairs to my car and then to Goodwill. I'm pretty sure I heard one of her knees give way on the 2nd flight and I know that I ended up straining some muscles in my arm and back, but we got 'er done and went to lunch at my favorite salad bar. I ran a few more errands, did a bit of shopping, grabbed some sushi takeout and Sapporo, got in my pjs and settled in for the evening to watch Teen Witch and give my poor back a break.
Sunday was intended to be mellow, with a visit to a nearby friend's place to watch the Skeleton Theater. It was really rainy and quite cool that evening, so we warmed ourselves fire-side and chatted as the kiddos came for their treats. When we decided to head over to watch the show I grabbed my phone so I could take photos to send to Bear and realized I had multiple missed calls from various unknown numbers as well as new voicemails. Turns out the Madre had locked herself out of her house and had been frantically trying to get in touch with me so I could use my set of keys to let her in.
I ended up missing the show to go and rescue her, but had a lovely night with my friends nonetheless. I can't say I'll necessarily make staying in on Halloween a trend, but this year it was exactly what I needed.
"National Blog Posting Month is the epicenter of daily blogging! People who want to set the habit of blogging by doing it every day for a month, including weekends, can come here for moral support, inspiration, and the camaraderie that only marathon blogging can provide."
After failing my NaNoWriMo challenge last year I definitely had no plans to participate this year, especially considering how busy my November will already be with Turkish classes and Sensual Movement classes every week. That's a lotta words. Every day. I barely had time for it last year, this year it would be ridiculous to even try.
Buuuuut this morning I came across another blog mentioning NaBloPoMo - one blog post per day? I can do that.
Approaching a year of being together, it really feels like a more than appropriate time to put the effort into learning his language since he's been so dutifully learning mine. The day after Turkfest (which was fun and educational) I ventured back to the website for the Turkish American Cultural Association of Washington (TACAWA for shortsies) to look into the classes I know they usually offer. Turns out that the Fall Quarter for Beginning Turkish basically runs for 6 weeks starting the first week of November, with one two hour class every Wednesday.
Bear is going to be gone at least 6 weeks and probably a bit longer, so really, the timing couldn't be more perfect. While he's gone, I'll be gettin' my learnin' on. It's gonna cost me a bit more than Rosetta Stone did, but the ability to communicate with my boo in his native language is pretty much priceless, in my humble opinion.
Soooo, by the time he returns I'll actually be able to speak some Turkish and give him a lap dance. Hokahey!
Shortly after my most recent post earlier this month, Bear confirmed the date for his return trip to Istanbul (leaving exactly one month before our one year anniversary.) I was basically left with just over 2 weeks to get in all the Fall festivities and snuggle time I could manage. We went go carting, we went to TurkFest, we went to The Farm, we carved a pumpkin (his first jack-o-lantern,) drank a lot of tea and watched the rest of The Wire Season 3 together. It was pretty darn glorious and I was feeling like I was definitely mentally prepared to be away from my guy for a few months.
Oh, I was wrong. (But at least this time I didn't put him through 2 weeks of being all weepy beforehand!)
It's been a rough week. Realizing that not only did my boyfriend leave he took my best friend with him was tough (and eye-opening,) and work has been a little crazy with the impending ownership changes...I was ready for the weekend by Tuesday afternoon and feeling totally unprepared and uninspired for what is usually my favorite holiday EVER - Halloween.
Finally yesterday I got to talk to Bear on the phone, which was a huge help in raising my spirits. We'd only been able to email and that is honestly one of my least favorite ways of communicating (most likely because I am totally impatient.) Last night I got to visit with my favorite homegirls AND my favorite 'mos and tonight I'll probably get to see my dude on Skype, so I'm hoping to be mostly cleared of my funk by this weekend.
Still, I have 2 classes starting next week and a somewhat busy schedule - it probably wouldn't hurt to stay in, right?
I've never seen them live which is mind-boggling since they are a freakin' Seattle band, but they play here so INfrequently I don't have many options. The only concert date they've had locally since I discovered the Absolutes album just happened to be on the evening that we flew to SF for Bear's show, and the next one is actually only a performance at a Symphony Guild event.
The cool part would be that I've got family in that area that could meet up with me, including 2 college-age cousins who I don't get to visit with nearly enough AND it would be a fun first time roadtrip with Bear. We could probably stay with my lovely school-teacher Aunt, but I'm concerned we might overwhelm the bf with family stuff so I've been scoping out hotels for Friday night.
Still, it's quite the trek. On the other hand, I have no idea when they'll play a full show in Seattle again and it's NOT OKAY that I haven't seen them live.
How far would you go to see one of your favorite bands play?
I took a few weeks off from running after Iron Girl and managed to maintain my lower weight, but lately I've found myself feeling so "blah" that I knew I had to get out and hit the pavement again - if not for my waist, for my sanity. Thankfully, I'd typically rather run in the rain than than the hot sun, so this is always a productive time of year for increasing my mileage.
On those days where I'm just not feeling up to getting wet, I've stocked up enough DVDs to keep me occupied and have a groupon for Hot Yoga I finally need to use; in November I'm signed up for Pole for the Soul's "Art of Seduction & Exotic Dance" 4 week class, which should also hopefully help keep me toned up.
One DVD in my arsenal that I haven't gotten to try much but I'm looking forward to using frequently this fall is "Element: Ballet Conditioning." The reviews were pretty good and the workout I tried during my 10k training was kinda brutal even with variations and occasional breaks, so I'm extremely curious to see the results of a few months of using it. If So You Think You Can Dance is any indicator, dancers usually seem to have bangin' bodies and I feel it's definitely worth a try.
What about you: is there a routine you follow in the colder months? Do you give in to the holidays and bust your ass in the Spring to try to get your "summer body" back? Or do you go with "just say no to cookies" when the inevitable piles make their way to your office?
In the meantime, to spark creativity when needed, I have become quite partial to a cookbook written by someone else: Kitty Greenwald. Oddly enough, I found her on Esty (my favorite social commerce website.) Kitty is the chef for "Eatsy" lunches at the Brooklyn offices: a regular Wednesday staff meal that is provided by the company for employees. One of her recipes was featured on an e-newsletter I received and from there my attention was drawn to her super cute cookbook titled "Life's Too Short to Chop Onions: 99 Dinners to Make When You'd Rather Be Doing Something Else."
Not that I often wish I were doing something else; clearly I love cooking, but I'm definitely not a fan of hugely involved recipes that take hours or days of work...I was immediately intrigued enough to purchase the book.
So far, I've made the Baked Chicken Meatballs, Red Rice Royale, Brazen Broccoli (adapted with frozen heads to save even more time,) Simply Stewed (made with home grown chard instead of spinach,) One Potato Two Potato Gratin, and used a few of her basic recipes for salmon and asparagus. Every single thing that I've made has gone over like gangbusters, and her suggested menus have been incredibly helpful at pairing items together - I really couldn't be more pleased.
Out of the stack of cookbooks I have in my kitchen at all times, this one definitely gets used the most. The recipes do seem very Mediterranean-based (probably why the bf is such a fan,) but I have been informed that the recipe for "Turkish Oranges" is not so authentic...As in, my Turkish boyfriend had no clue what they were.
Of course one day I hope to be able to call myself a published author of a cookbook, but for now I'll be working my way through Kitty's. What is YOUR favorite cookbook or recipe resource?
Had one of those weekends that vacillated between wonderfully cozy and absolute suck, and I ended up on the other side in a funk, for sure. Even with a haircut scheduled and a light day at work, my Monday wasn't looking too great.
Thankfully, by the time I left Helle at 8 PM (after sticking around for a glass of wine and a long overdue chance to catch up with one of my besties,) I was the proud owner of a new Sour Puss oven mitt/pot holder set, the happy reciever of multiple hugs, and less of a sad-sack.
"Communication planet Mercury battles it out when Pluto, the planet that tends to obsess to the point of domination. If you’re feeling at all depressed, unsatisfied, anxious or even wishy-washy about something going on in your life, those thoughts could lead to compulsions, and those compulsions could show their nasty little faces when you’re interacting with those closest to you. Meaning, while you may try to divulge your emotions and frustrations, you could end up causing harm to your relationships by saying too much, being too harsh or acting without enough care and consideration. At the same time, it’s important to be aware that someone else may bring their problems onto you, and in a wrong or ineffective way."
Those of you who were running around in Seattle's 75+ degree weather this Saturday may not be convinced, but the Farmer's Almanac is predicting a "mild & very wet" winter for the Pacific Northwest. I'm pretty glad I started stocking up on rainboots.
I spent most of my weekend on the Island and by Sunday morning (ok, let's be real - I woke up at noon) the sound of rain falling from the balcony above the window in Bear's bedroom had become a very familiar noise. I did my usual social media and email catch up via blackberry from the warm comfort of the blankets next to my sleepy boyfriend. Perusing through my daily influx of discount offers from Groupon, LivingSocial, Tippr and the like I found THE PERFECT DEAL for getting into the spirit of Fall (see? I'm so ready I'm even capitalizing it these days.)
For a surprisingly small amount of money, the bf and I have earned access to The Farm at Swan's Trail and it's huge 12-acre corn maze ("it contains over 250 actual roads and 400 places and towns marked by signs...There are 4-1/2 actual miles of highways and country roads within the maze,") putting course, cow train, hay maze, and petting zoo. Oh, and I can't forget to mention the WAGON RIDES and PUMPKIN PATCH, right?
You might think it strange for a grown woman to be so excited over all this and equally cruel to intend to drag my unassuming bf along, but I've got it under good authority that fun can and usually is had by all; the yelp reviews are pretty assuring too.
Whatever, it's all part of the Officially Embracing Fall 2010® campaign. The Official Search For Rainboots continues this evening, followed by a huge helping of homemade spaghetti and garlic bread. Maybe even some hot tea. While wearing a sweater. Yeahhhh.
Because I'm all about supporting my boo, I went to Bear's show Saturday night. Unfortunately, due to a miscommunication and the ensuing dispute I ended up staying well past my intended 11 PM departure time. Thankfully I didn't drink more than 2 Coronas the entire evening, but basically that put me in bed at 1 AM and asleep around 2 AM when I planned to be out of bed by 6:30 and on my way to Greenlake from West Seattle by 7 AM.
So, yeah, I did the Iron Girl 10k on 4.5 hours of sleep.
The Madre gave up her Sunday morning to give me a ride and support me, wisely bringing a bottle or two of water for the trip and trying to pump me up while I slowly chewed up a Luna bar and some dry puffed corn cakes. I'm never much fun before 9 AM, so I really appreciate that she selflessly agrees to chauffeur my grumpy ass around for my races; I'm even hoping next year we might be able to do the Iron Girl 5k as a Mother/Daughter Team!
Bear was miffed at me from the night before so I didn't get a single word of encouragement from him, which was a total bummer considering how important this run was to me. Thankfully, I knew the Madre was rooting for me at the finish line and got some textual encouragement from Cec mid-run so I managed to keep my head up and power through all 6.2 miles.
Oh, I was so glad for that run to be done. After we trekked back to Ma's car I was seriously too tired to even think about having breakfast and just wanted to get home to shower and change into some pjs so I could lounge the rest of the day away. Around 11 AM I called Bear and woke him up; he cabbed to my place shortly after, smooching me awake from my mini nap when he arrived and thoroughly congratulating me on my accomplishment.
I ordered up some celebratory pizza and wings for delivery, made some hummus and we spent the rest of the day napping and watching The Wire as we munched.
I was pretty sore and slow for the next 36 hours, but after eating fast food again on Monday and taking a few days off from any type of official fitness activity I'm finding myself incredibly antsy to get running again. Even though I don't have a specific distance I need to train for, I would like to get my average pace down below 10 minutes a mile before the Jingle Run - I suppose that as long as there is some goal that I have yet to attain, there will be the motivation to keep going.
Ok, yeah, now I'm ready.
A year ago today I was one day away from meeting Bear and my other dear Turkish friends.
I was a smoker.(!)
I had more piercings and less tattoos.
I was about 10 pounds heavier.
I was "running" about 2 miles at a go, with an average pace of 12'43", now my short runs are 2 miles and my pace averages 10'52".
I owned way more heels than flats.
So, like, things are generally pretty great, but honestly I've been having a difficult time being upbeat for the last half of this week.
My birthday, while nice and mellow, was a bit of a let down and I haven't been able to spend much time with Bear following our return from San Francisco because each weekend since then one or the other of us has had separate plans/obligations.
Now, although it's a special weekend for me (my birthday, 1 year of Bear and after 2+ months of training the Iron Girl 10k is finally here!) it looks like he won't be able to participate in any of it. Also, I bailed on having a birthday party mostly because of the show this weekend and it's looking like I'll essentially end the week having spent about 4 hours of non-sleep time with him. I realize his absence work-related, but it's still hard not to be sad that (again) he won't be able to share in these things that are important to me.
I just keep praying to some higher power that someday, somehow (preferably sooner than later) there won't be this feeling of "not enough" and we'll be able to get sick of spending too much time together. (Me praying to give up more of my "me" time?? No, I have not been body-snatched, lets just chalk that up as another big change this year.)
As for this weekend, I'm doing my best to resist the desire for mopey hibernation as I do have a little picnic planned with a few of my ladies tomorrow afternoon and 6.2 miles to run bright and early Sunday morning; my Madre will be there to see me cross that finish line and I am gonna do it with a smile.
The show was cool (I always love to see people singing along and the gussied-up girls trying to get as close to the stage as possible) and there definitely seems to be a younger Turkish crowd there than I've seen so far in Seattle. They even had raki available at the bar - a very nice touch, but I may never drink the stuff again.
All in all, we did get to visit Chinatown, the Fisherman's Wharf and historic piers, Ghiradelli Square, Haight/Ashbury and I brought home some cute little souvenirs for me, the Madre and my best homegirls without making myself broke for the last 2 weeks of the month. The weather was mostly cooperative, I had a great time taking photos of graffiti and I swear I'll visit the Tonga Room when I go back.
I originally wanted to do something memorable for my 30th, instead I'm going to bury my head in the sand and pretend it doesn't exist. I know I could arrange something, but I can't seem to find the enthusiasm to plan an event where I am compromising what I want to work around their show and I wouldn't feel right doing it on that Saturday anyway and leaving them out. If anything, I'll treat myself to a spa day and celebrate with a massage - I could definitely use it these days...
Because now, after a month of psyching myself up for a trip to SF for another show (and RSVPing as a "no" for a once-a-year-event that I was incredibly sad to have to miss as well as missing out on a much awaited and anticipated Barcelona show that is now SOLD OUT), clearing time off from work, dropping $$ getting my "goin' to SF haircut" yesterday and scheduling my entire week around preparing for the departing flight this Friday afternoon, Bear tells me we may not be going.
I basically won't find out until the day before I need to pack whether or not I'll be flying to San Francisco this weekend. As much as I love my boyfriend, this shit is giving me an ulcer and a complex.
Up until the past week I had been almost excited about it's arrival and now I basically hang my head in defeat, moments from crying in frustration. On the day I intended to send out invites for a small gathering the 2nd weekend of September, I had a disagreement with a few close friends that left me reeling and questioning the ultimate future of those friendships.
At that point, I said to myself (and my boyfriend):"Fuck 'em - I'm going to (adult) Disneyland (aka Vegas)." Being the sweet boyfriend that he is, he said "anything you want aşkim," even though in fact it turned out to be likely that I would be getting nothing but a damn headache.
A few days later MM (MaSKott's Manager) tells me that they are working on another show in Seattle for that weekend. Sooo, my birthday gets bumped and I start looking at other travel dates. Then a few days after that I realize that tickets are just plain out of my budget, since I am saving to move in a few months. So, bummed once again, I try to start planning something small in town. Though it's almost a month away, it's a busy travel season and my friends can occasionally be hard to pin down (and I'm a Virgo - it just plain stresses me out to not be able to plan my shiz in advance.)
Still waiting on word about the show, my choices are basically limited to 2 things that aren't really what I originally wanted to do (Saturday picnic in the park - sounds lovely, right? Friends, sandwiches, sun, maybe a little badminton or volley ball?): I can have a dinner party on a Friday after I spend the whole day working then would have to rush to get ready and fight traffic to the Island and pray that it's not a huge hassle for my friends (along with a few other logistical issues,) or do a picnic on Sunday and pray that I have fun but that I'm also in decent enough condition on to work on Monday, which is typically my busiest and most stressful day (and one I cannot take off.) And then there's the precarious "invitation situation..."
At this point, I'd rather do absolutely nothing than worry about it anymore. That means I get to stay 29, right??
I am one stinkin' mile away from the Green Level at the Nike Running website. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this uber helpful and motivating site (which is, like, all of you, I'm sure) the levels break down as follows:
"Nike+ Levels is a new way to recognize the total distance you’ve achieved since joining Nikerunning.com.
There are six Levels that correspond to total kilometers run:
Yellow (0-49km, 0-30mi)
Orange (50-249km, 31-154mi)
Green (250-999km, 155-620mi)
Blue (1,000-2,499km, 621-1552mi)
Purple (2,500-4,999km, 1553-3106mi)
Black (over 5000km or 3107mi)
As you move from one Level to another, we will recognize your achievements in different ways. Look for your color to follow you through the features in Nikerunning.com, updating your entire profile as you reach new Levels."
Starting today (and lasting at least until my upcoming trip to SF if not indefinitely,) crackers and chips are not welcome in my home (Wheat THINS, my ass!) and I'm taking my cross training days and nutrition more seriously. I can change my body, dammit. I'm not gonna kill myself trying to get skinny, but I can try harder to be in better shape.
At least my 4 mile run tonight will put me into that pretty pretty Green level I have been coveting for the past 55 miles.
As tired as I am today, my morning was brightened by a bit of what I am assuming was drunk Facebooking on the part of one of my friends. Behold the out-of-nowhere drahms:
Now, the girl mentioned is NOT friends with me on FB and though she has never done a thing to me personally, this dude is not the only of our close friends who isn't fond of her nor is he the first to be vocal about their personal observations and subsequent questions about the quality of her character.
Frankly, I'm particularly curious about the "greatest blowjobs" part...Well, that and why MY wall was the target of this revelation. Either way, I had a good chuckle to start off my Friday.
(plus one super awesome orange kitty.)
Thankfully, I believe I have solved the "omg, what do I wear?" dilemma in advance and hopefully will expend some of the extra nervous energy beforehand with brunch and an afternoon ladies gathering...They're bound to be lovely, fun distractions from my current state of antici..................pation.
Since I quit smoking almost 4 months ago (Three months, four weeks, one day, 19 hours, 27 minutes and 22 seconds to be precise) and took up running again a few weeks ago, my pace has improved considerably. Finally I am running consistently below 12 minutes a mile and am getting closer and closer to 11 (okay, for semantics' sake, I am a jogger - whatever)! I have faith that by the time I run the Iron Girl I can safely and easily keep a pace around 10. None of this means much to my boyfriend, nonetheless I really truly appreciate his support.
I'm only preparing to run a 10K this time so my "long runs" are pretty unimpressive, but while Bear was gone I barely ran at all so I feel like I'm starting from scratch in a sense. Now I am quickly back on the bandwagon, running 3 times a week and doing various cross training other days, with only Monday and Friday as "rest" days. I feel great although I have gone up a few pounds from the extra activity...I know I'm moving in the right direction and that weight will drop off soon enough.
As my 30th birthday swiftly approaches, I face it with a big smile and a fitter booty.
Now, we had started watching together but he had jumped ahead of me in his ample free time during the week and left me in the dust at episode 3, so it's not like I was making him watch a show he didn't enjoy.
My homegirl Cec had been telling me about this show for a while and insisting I watch but I had resisted, thinking that the promise of naked dudes and bloody fights wasn't necessarily up my alley. I was so wrong.
Bear brought home the DVD set with Turkish subtitles and once we ran out of other shows we like to watch together, we finally broke out Spartacus. Here's the disclaimer I didn't see until I was on disc 3 of the first season:
“Spartacus is a historical depiction of ancient Rome’s society and culture.Those Romans were dirtydirty, y'all. And jeezus, all the gore - on a few occasions I was glad I had decided to eat before I watched that particular episode. And I honestly have not seen that many weiners and six-packs in my life.
The intensity of the sensuality, brutality and language is to suggest and
authentic representation of that period.”
Thank you, Sam Raimi (and you, Cec!)
I treasure my privacy almost as much as I pride myself in my honesty, but at this moment I find myself torn between putting my frustrations out here for sympathy, input, whatever or just eating it and trying to figure it out myself and continuing to stress and fret. I feel like it's always better to talk things through, but the imperative word is "talk" - right now I'm just stewing.
Well, whatever. It gives me a good enough reason to chat with the GBF and hang with Dubs tonight before I run some of my stress off.
After a sweltering and beautiful weekend in Seattle, I ended up with just enough Sunday to tidy up my apartment and relax.
And now it's supposed to be the hottest week so far this year, which will be totally not awesome for my running. It doesn't cool down until almost 10 in the evening so I'll have to buck up and run in the heat or start waking up early, which sounds pretty awful. Guh. I took a mini break from running this weekend since my social calendar was pretty packed and I have an extra few weeks to get ready for Iron Girl.
Friday afternoon at work was crappy though I did manage to sneak out a few minutes early, but then I ended up losing my house key somewhere between work and Target and my car (with all spares sitting on my hallway table, of course)...After I broke down into tears of frustration on the phone with the bulding manager I was ready to call it a day and just curl into a ball hiding in my bed, but Bear convinced me that I would be fine with a bit of time and relaxation and we actually did end up going to a friend's show - having a very nice time listening to live music in Pioneer Square. MM and her hubs met up with us and she had gotten me a beautiful nazar (or evil eye) bracelet (she's always looking out for me, that one) that I immediately put on (since I know there has to be a person or two wishing me bad luck at any given time.)
Thanks to her, I'm sure, the rest of my weekend was pretty much a breeze - cooking, bbqs and authentic home-cooked Indian food with old friends and new, and of course fireworks (though we ended the 4th snuggled on my couch trying to watch Hot Tub Time Machine.)
Virgo Horoscope for week of July 1, 2010
So how is 2010 going for you so far, Virgo? "Great, Rob, thanks for asking!"
Have you been taking advantage of life's offers to help you move into a dynamic new phase of your relationship life? "Um yes, how'd you know?"
Have you been willing to set aside tired old strategies for seeking intimacy so that you can discover approaches you've never imagined before? "Well, yeah..."
Have you been brave about overcoming the past traumas and hurts that scared you into accepting less than the very best alliances you could seek? "OMG, yes."
I hope you've been pursuing these improvements, because this is the best year in over a decade to accomplish them. "Hey ALRIGHT!"
Review in painstaking detail the history of your life, honoring every moment as if you were conducting a benevolent Judgment Day. Forgive yourself of every mistake except one.* "ONE?? Oy."
Got too drunk on a Friday at Neighbors (my first visit in probably 6 years - possibly my last for at least another 6.)
All that and a whole lot of nothing...'Twas perfection.
Rubaiyat/36 - RUMII am thrilled to report that I made it through the first week after my boyfriend's return alive and well!
When I am with you our loving won't let me sleep.
Away from you the tears won't let me sleep.
God, it's amazing to be awake both nights,
But how different these awakenings are!
As a matter of fact, I've pretty much spent the week in domestic heaven; making breakfast every morning and lunch or dinner every evening, pulling out cookbooks or just throwing shiz together. Except for another sad salmon experience (I've successfully cooked salmon to my liking once ever,) I've been pretty darn pleased with my results. I'm quite sure that through hours of experimentation and trials over the past 4 months I have almost perfected my quesadilla.
It has seemed so easy to pick up where we were (though we have been much more homebody than we usually are,) happily spending most of our nights watching episodes of our favorite TV shows. Bear is still jet-lagged of course and I've gotten very adept at napping once a day - something I don't think I could really ever complain about. There's also been lots of coffees and laughing and kisses.
He trekked home this morning when Cec and I attended another class with Faye the Tattooed Psychic at Helle, so I ended up inadvertently getting a little Domestic Goddess Sunday time to relax, do laundry and figure out some recipes for the week of vacation that starts the day after tomorrow (squee!). I'm currently surrounded by a pile of cookbooks (Life's Too Short to Chop Onions: 99 Dinners to Make When You'd Rather Be Doing Something Else being one of my new favorites,) The Pocket Rumi, and my dayplanner which is beautifully untainted next week.
Also, I've got a whole bunch of vacation scheduled soon and the weather in Seattle is pretty.darn.beautiful lately.
My dear readers, can you guess where this is going? I imagine the next few weeks will be a smidge busy (and/or incredibly lazy) and though I will do my best, I doubt that I will be posting here very often or with much detail until the beginning of July. Picture me having a fantastic time, as per yooj, and please accept my apologies in advance (again). >:/
xoxo & regards,
Three (üç) more days until I can wrap my arms around my boyfriend again. I kinda feel like I am going to explode.
Determining factors: I've got to work (at my job in an industrial/dirty-ish office where I wear jeans, t-shirts and baseball caps most of the time and anything nice would cause heart-attacks if not mild sexual harassment) on Monday and will be going directly from there to my hair appointment with Chivahn at Helle, then over to the Island where my beautiful jet-lagged boyfriend will be waiting at his home. Also, the forecast is suggesting the temperatures will be in the 70s so while my office will be really effing cold, outside it will be dress weather. But...a dress seems a bit much when my only intentions are to scoop him up and take him directly back to my apartment to "catch up."
Normally I would be all for picking up a new outfit, but the majority of my funds are tied up right now, I'm pretty busy for the next few days and for once I don't actually feel like shopping.
Although I could use some new shoes...New shoes never hurt. ;)
I know that may sound weird or kind of sh*tty, but for the past 3 months life has pretty much been business as usual, the only difference being I am Skyping with someone on a pretty regular basis (so, it's basically like the times I have sworn off boys except this time I actually still have a boyfriend.) I go out by myself or with my long-term homies, I sleep alone in the middle of the bed, I don't shave my legs, etc. Add to that the fact that Bear is increasingly busy so we haven't been skyping as much and you get me feeling like a kinda boring single girl.
It's a unpleasant feeling.
I've scheduled any necessary beauty maintenance appointments (gettin' my girl on), arranged time to finish any leftover projects at home (hello, filing) and have deep cleaned my place like no one's business (how often do you clean your toaster?) Vacation has been scheduled, extra time has been added to pad it and from the 17th to the 29th of June I only have to work one long day. It's gonna be pretty awesome.
Still, I am a little nervous...We have been apart for a while and I have no idea what to expect, but I love him to bits and I just can't wait to see him smile in 3-D.
And that's my first article. Nothing major (no really, I'm not making enough to quit my day job or anything,) nothing fancy, but a good enough start for me.
Gah, I could never imagine buying a Valentino bag but I know I can find affordable versions of all the other pieces, not to mention I already own the gun/flower necklace and the shoes. I still feel like it's missing something - what do you think?
Honestly though, I have NO idea what to wear them with. With a cut like this on a shoe, I feel you really need to stick with as much bare leg as possible to avoid "shortening" yourself, even with such a high platform.
. by sasha?sasha featuring Steven by Steve Madden shoes (I pretty much love everything about this except the shorts - easy enough to imagine with a distressed jean miniskirt, which is more my style)